Feelings of Not Being Good Enough

 We’ve all felt “not good enough” at some point in our lives. Maybe you feel like you’ll never pass your exam, attract a good partner, or move up in your company.

It’s important that you challenge these thoughts because if you dwell on them for too long, they can turn into full-blown beliefs and negatively impact your self-esteem.

Here are 5 questions you can ask yourself when you’re not feeling good enough.

1. What evidence do I have that I’m not good enough?

Often our negative thoughts are based on feelings rather than evidence. And when we take time to examine the facts, we realize that we’re a lot more capable than we thought.

You may even have “impostor syndrome,” a psychological phenomenon that causes you to doubt your own accomplishments. People with impostor syndrome believe their success is due to luck or other external factors rather than their own abilities.

Remind yourself that you’ve worked hard to get where you are in life.

2. Am I comparing myself to others unfairly?

Sometimes we feel like we’re not good enough because we’re comparing ourselves to others who are in different circumstances.

We may also be comparing our own weaknesses to another person’s strengths. It’s important to remember that everyone has their own unique journey.

3. What are my strengths and accomplishments?

Focusing on your strengths and accomplishments can help you feel more confident and capable. Take some time to list out your achievements and positive qualities.

This list doesn’t have to include tangible awards like a trophy — although it certainly can. You can also include positive qualities you possess, such as always doing your best or being kind to animals.

4. What’s the worst that could happen if I’m not perfect?

Often, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to be perfect, but this can be unrealistic and unhelpful. You may even have atelophobia, an obsessive fear of imperfection.

It can be helpful to ask yourself what the worst-case scenario is if you’re not perfect, and you’ll probably find that it’s not as bad as you imagined. In fact, making mistakes is how we learn and grow.

5. What can I do to improve how I feel?

Think of things you can do to improve your mood and feelings of self-worth. This could be:

• taking a break
• practicing self-care
• talking with a friend or therapist
• doing something that brings you joy
• 
  

  Reminder: You’re good enough

  There are numerous reasons why you’re good enough. Here are four of them:

  1. You are unique: You have a unique set of skills, qualities, and experiences that make you who you are. No one else can be exactly like you, and that makes you special.
  2. You’re capable of growth: Nobody is perfect, and everyone has areas where they can improve. But the fact that you recognize that you want to improve and are willing to work on it shows that you have the ability to grow and learn.
     
  3. You’ve achieved things in your life: You’ve likely accomplished many things in your life, big and small. It could be completing a project, being a good friend, or taking care of your family. These accomplishments show that you have the ability to succeed.
  4. You are here: You are alive and living on this earth, which means you have a purpose and a place in this world. You have the opportunity to make a difference, create something, or contribute to society in your own way.